Tag Archives: Humor

Action, gun control, Humor, Law, Politics, So Much Stupid!

A Semi-Auto Ban I Can Support

Relax. Just wait for it.

I wrote to my state senator, asking him to vote for an amended version of Georgia Senate Bill 281: Dangerous Instrumentalities and Practices; possession of automatic and semi-automatic guns; prohibit; revise and provide definitions.

“Amended” version, because the bill includes some troubling things like a ban on “high capacity” magazines (10+) and outlawing private sales at gun shows. But I want the ban — total, not just “assault weapons;” no grandfathering — to pass as written. It’s all in the definition of “automatic and semi-automatic guns.”

As used in this part, the term:
(1) ‘Automatic or semi-automatic gun’ means any weapon which shoots or is designed to shoot:
(A) Automatically, more than six shots, without manual reloading, by a single function of the trigger; or
(B) Without any action needed to fire consecutive shots, other than having ammunition loaded in such weapon’s feeding device.

You see it, don’t you? Maybe not: “Automatically, more than six shots” or “Without any action”

So this letter went to Georgia Senator William Ligon, 3rd District:

Sen. Ligon,

I’m one of your constituents in St Marys, and a writer for The Zelman Partisans and The Truth About Guns. I cover firearms policy and law.

Sen Donzella James has filed SB 281 (Dangerous Instrumentalities and Practices; possession of automatic and semi-automatic guns; prohibit), I hope you will consider the following actions and encourage your fellow legislators to go along.

1. Amend to strike the ban on “high” capacity magazines (more than ten rounds) and private sales at gun shows.

2. Vote to pass the remaining ban on “possession of automatic and semi-automatic guns.”

As written, Sen. James has succeeded in “banning” semi-autos without actually banning anything, except possibly malfunctioning firearms. Passing this would be hilarious. If you aren’t quite sure why, this column explains.

www.thetruthaboutguns.com/georgia-senate-bill-281-would-ban-all-semi-automatic-firearms/

Thank you for your time.

Carl “Bear” Bussjaeger

If you live in Georgia, you may want to contact your own senator.

For those concerned about Georgians losing machine guns, worry not. The bill leaves intact existing language in the law which had already banned machine guns unless they’re registered under the NFA.

[Permission to republish this article is granted so long as it is not edited, and the author and The Zelman Partisans are credited.]

Carl is an unpaid TZP volunteer. If you found this post useful, please consider dropping something in his tip jar. He could really use the money, what with ISP bills. And the rabbits need feed. Click here to donate via PayPal.
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authoritarian swine, gun control, Humor, Politics, So Much Stupid!

[UPDATE 2] Laugh of the Day: Andrea Chamblee

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See updates below. This is  getting serious.

Maybe even the week. We’ll see.

Andrea Chamblee wants her some gun control, and she ‘s mad that State Sen. Bobby Zirkin “slow-walked” a universal preemptively-prove-your-innocence bill. But the funny part is why she wanted that passed.

…the bill that would make it illegal for already disqualified people to obtain rifles and shotguns at gun shows and other transfers. (emphasis added)

She thinks it’s legal for prohibited persons (“disqualified people”) to obtain rifles and shotguns.

So I tweeted to her that it’s been unlawful for prohibited persons to obtain firearms for decades Try to keep up. And that’s where it started getting funny.

From the NRA website:
“Maryland does NOT regulate the sale of rifles or shotguns and no permit is required to purchase a rifle or shotgun that is not an “assault weapon.” Nov 12, 2014
Keep up. Dumazz? Liar? Both!

Yes, in a discussion of prohibited persons, she’s citing the VNRA on Maryland state laws on long gun regulation. I cited 18 U.S. Code § 922(g), Gun Control Act of 1968. And laughed at her carefully considered and mature use of language.

Her response:

So the NRA webpage is lying? Whine to Putin.
Ok, Boomer?

-face palm- She still doesn’t grasp that she’s looking at the wrong reference. And I’ve got no clue what Putin has to do with this. Maybe she thinks 18 U.S. Code § 922 is a Russian law. Does that “§” look Cyrillic to you?

The “OK, Boomer” is great. That’s the first time anyone has pulled that on me. And this time seems a little… odd.

Unless she’s led a particularly hard life, I’d say she could easily be older than I. Somehow, I thought I’d first hear it from a Millennial or whatever they’re tagging younger folks as.

If Andrea wants to be a gun control activist, she really should learn something about gun control. I referred her to our Gun Culture Primer.

I needed those laughs. Gun People controlling victim disarmers aren’t usually so entertaining in their ignorance.

UPDATE: Holy Moley. Andrea Chamblee thinks MD Crim Law Code § 5-622(b) & 18 U.S. Code § 922(g) are a Russian conspiracy pushed by Putin, and that it’s actually lawful to sell rifles & shotguns to prohibited persons.

Is that really her, and she’s that fugbuck nuts? Or has someone hacked her Twitter account?

You know it’s legal to sell it to him. You’re just spreading Russian propaganda on behalf of Putin. Putin has figured out how to murder Americans. He just has other Americans do it. Other Americans who spread hate and conspiracy theories like you

If that’s Chamblee, and not some prankster trying to make her look bad, she’s in need of some serious professional help.

UPDATE 2: I’m heartbroken. </sarc>

I guess that was the real Chamblee. Hopefully someone will get her some help.

[Permission to republish this article is granted so long as it is not edited, and the author and The Zelman Partisans are credited.]

Carl is an unpaid TZP volunteer. If you found this post useful, please consider dropping something in his tip jar. He could really use the money, what with ISP bills. And the rabbits need feed. Click here to donate via PayPal.
(More Tip Jar Options)
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So Much Stupid!, You can't fix stupid

“I’m going to jail.”

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Not exactly RKBA, but too funny not to share.

Turn up your sound so you can hear everything.

“Oh, f##k, f##k.”

“I’m going to jail.”

“Please? Please?”

“Please? I’m sorry.”

“Help?”

But note: the clerk was on the phone as soon as she realized what was happening. And it took the police 10 minutes to arrive. 10 minutes can be a long time when you’re in danger and counting on someone else to save you. Fortunately, she had her act together and got everyone else out of danger.

Oh. And, uh, pro tip: shooting security locks open generally only works in movies.

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hatred of Jews, Israel, Jewish history, Politics, resistance, spirit of rebellion, The Zelman Partisans

Twas a Night During Hanukkah

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Twas a night during Hanukkah and all through the house, not a creature was stirring except for a mouse.

And Cowgirl Kitty killed it.

My Hanukkiah had been lit, and into sufganiyot and latkas I had bit and I smiled with joy that the three of them bring.

Little Marlowe gently snored on his puppy bed, and I snuggled in, with thoughts of Hanukkah in my head.

And who to my wondering eyes should appear? Judah Maccabee, it WAS him, I swear!

I sat up quite started, “Sir, you give me quite a fright, why do you appear here in the dead of the night?”

He regarded me gravely and tugged on his beard, he said so very softly “It’s the things I have heard”.

My eyes widened just as his narrowed, and I shivered in my bones, clear down to the marrow.

Judah, what has you so troubled I asked with a frown, you know you’re one of my heroes, you know it deep down!

He sighed as he listed the attacks both great and small, in France, in England, the USA and Israel, worst of all,

Hannah and her sons, my father, my brothers and I did not fight and give our lives, so that latkas you could fry. The dreidels you do spin, the songs you do sing, they should be a strong reminder there are still evil things.

We loved G-d our father, he created this earth, to serve him we certainly have proven our worth.

Those that would keep us from observing his rules, have mistaken our courage, they must have been fools.

He gave us great victories, he gave back our Temple, you should have held on, it is just that simple.

No Jew may pray there, nor Christian it seems, Beit HaMikdash lives only in my dreams.

In France Jews are told no Menorah to light, so as to avoid the evil in the night.

G-d gave us the miracle of such great victory, he gave us the miracle of the oil, it is our history. To turn our backs and ignore? What a sad mystery!

Judah smiled sadly, and said “The Zelmans Partisans, it fights the good fight you are warriors all. My spirit is beside you, you must heed the call!” We were partisans, we Maccabees, we know of your struggle, we’ve made the same pleas.

Freedom comes dear, without effort it won’t last. Keep your sword sharp and ready, be prepared to draw fast.

Your weapons they will try to seize, your faith try to shake, and you must hold both close. Make no mistake.

Judah then brightened and said with a smile, you all are doing good work. You all spread the word, keep it up and you will be heard.

He then began to fade and my eyes began to tear, Oh Judah I said, why did you come here?

It was then Marlowe barked and I awoke with a start, and I began to rethink the idea that Chipotle pepper Tabasco in latkas was a good idea.

חג חנוכה שמח

chag chanukkah sameach

Happy Hanukkah Holiday!!

Judah Maccabee Meme
Judah Maccabee Meme

 

 

With sincere, abject and humble apologies to Clement Clarke Moore. And probably a few of you that just suffered through my attempt at poetry!

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